disavow perfectionism

perfectionism is just fear in a nice outfit

let's call perfectionism what it actually is: a defense mechanism. when you insist everything has to be perfect before you put it out there, you're not maintaining high standards — you're protecting yourself from criticism. from failure. from being seen as anything less than flawless.

and it's quietly ruining your life.

how perfectionism destroys you

you never start — the project, the business, the creative work sits in your head forever because the conditions are never "right"
you never finish — everything you do produce gets endlessly revised, tweaked, and polished past the point of diminishing returns
you never enjoy the process — every task becomes a test you might fail rather than an experience you might learn from
you burn out — maintaining impossibly high standards in every area of your life is exhausting and unsustainable

perfectionism isn't the pursuit of excellence. excellence is flexible, adaptive, and grounded in reality. perfectionism is rigid, anxious, and grounded in fear.

the alternative

tal ben-shahar, in the pursuit of perfect, draws a crucial distinction between perfectionism and what he calls "optimalism." the optimalist:

accepts failure as a natural part of growth
enjoys the journey rather than fixating on the destination
sets high standards but adapts them to reality
takes action despite uncertainty

the shift isn't about lowering your standards. it's about detaching your self-worth from the outcome.

practical steps

ship at 80% — whatever you're working on, release it before it feels "ready." it's probably better than you think
set process goals, not outcome goals — "write for 30 minutes daily" beats "write a perfect novel"
celebrate effort, not just results — you showed up and tried? that counts
expose yourself to imperfection — post something unpolished. send the email with a typo. survive it

perfection is an illusion. progress is real. choose progress.

if this resonated, share it with someone who needs to hear it.