apologize

you know exactly who it is. you've been carrying it for weeks, months, maybe years. that person you hurt — through carelessness, selfishness, or plain cruelty — and never properly apologized to.

it's still in there, isn't it?

why you haven't done it yet

pride. fear of rejection. the convenient story you've told yourself that it was their fault too, or that it was so long ago it doesn't matter anymore.

it matters. if it didn't, you wouldn't still think about it.

what a real apology looks like

most apologies are garbage. "i'm sorry you felt that way" isn't an apology — it's a deflection. a real apology has three parts:

1. acknowledge specifically what you did — not vague hand-waving, but naming the exact behavior
2. own the impact — recognize how it affected them, without qualifying it with your intentions
3. don't ask for anything — a real apology isn't a transaction. you're not doing this to get forgiveness. you're doing it because it's right.

"i'm sorry i talked about your personal stuff behind your back. that was a betrayal of your trust and i'm sure it hurt. you deserved better from me."

that's it. no "but," no explanation, no asking them to forgive you.

they might not forgive you

and that's their right. your apology isn't about getting absolution. it's about taking responsibility. you can't control their response, only your action.

some people will appreciate it. some will still be angry. some won't respond at all. all of those outcomes are valid.

do it today

not tomorrow. not when the moment feels right. the moment will never feel right. send the text. make the call. write the letter.

the weight you've been carrying isn't just guilt — it's the person you're becoming by avoiding accountability. every day you don't address it, you reinforce the version of yourself that runs from hard truths.

be the person who makes it right, even when it's uncomfortable. especially when it's uncomfortable.

if this resonated, share it with someone who needs to hear it.