find commonalities

you're standing in line, sitting in a waiting room, or walking through a park. there are strangers everywhere. and your default setting is to ignore all of them, stare at your phone, and pretend other humans don't exist. today, you're going to override that setting.

the exercise

find a stranger. start a conversation. your mission: identify one genuine thing you have in common. it could be anything — a shared interest, a similar experience, a mutual frustration, a common background. you have the duration of the interaction to find it.

look for clues before you even open your mouth. what are they wearing? what are they reading? where are you both? what's the context? a person in a gym is already telling you something about their values. a person in a bookstore is giving you a conversation starter.

why this matters

the ability to connect with strangers is one of the most underrated life skills. it opens doors to opportunities, relationships, and perspectives you'd never encounter inside your existing social bubble. every person you meet knows something you don't, has been somewhere you haven't, and sees the world from an angle you've never considered.

but you'll never access any of that if you can't bridge the gap between "stranger" and "acquaintance."

the speed round

once you've done it with one person, find another stranger. this time, try to find the commonality faster. you're not just building social skills — you're building pattern recognition. the more you practice, the faster you get at reading people and finding connection points.

by the third or fourth stranger, something shifts. the anxiety decreases and genuine curiosity takes over. you stop performing and start connecting.

your assignment

today, talk to one stranger. find one thing in common. tomorrow, do it faster with a different person. by the end of the week, you'll have had more meaningful interactions with strangers than most people have in a month.

if this resonated, share it with someone who needs to hear it.